crazy girl head

it is now 10:40pm at night, and i have been up since 5am. their are two very obvious wrong things with that picture. one, it is about an hour past my normal bedtime, and two, i am not a morning person and 5am is super duper early for me. why the early start and the late night? oh c'mon, it should be obvious. a new guy of course! we'll refer to him as J. i'm trying to be cautious about the details even though out in the real world i've thrown caution to the wind. but for now i'm not going to disclose the who, what, when, where, why, and how. ..maybe eventually all the good details will be known.
for now i'm trying to be cool calm collected cool chick april. trying to enjoy this new experience, relish in the fact that me and this dude just might be on the same page. it is very new. we've only been dating for two weeks, but overall it has been great. i'm working on not getting carried away like i usually do when i find myself actually liking a guy. i'm looking forward to a "normal" week this week, as the first week he was in the picture my mom was in town, then last week he was out of town for four days. so this week is the first week where nothing but our normal schedules are there for us to work around. plus we've gotten over the initial jitters, and are more comfortable with each other.
i'm working on taking a step back, and trying not to rush into anything. honestly as much as i want to have certain conversations, at this point in time, it just isn't the right time. lately i've felt like i've become this serial dater, and i don't like it. J is a relationship kind of guy, and hopefully that is where this going, because i am definitely ready for that. until then crazy girl april needs to relax. not over analyze everything, and trust that in due time, things will happen just as they should.
....oh if only that were easier said than done!!!

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