the bump in my arm

take note of my left arm/elbow

this is a story about my left elbow. it looks funny. it was once broken. it is not double jointed. i'm going to try to make this a funny story, but to be honest i don't know how to do that, so it may not be funny. but, that is my intent.

i believe this happened the summer before i started first grade. so i was 6? i was across the street at my childhood friend Olivia's house playing in her front yard. up to the house is a walkway, and on one side of the walkway is this 3 foot wall (i'm guessing about the height), and we were both standing on this wall. at the time i was wearing one of my most favorite dresses. Olivia decided it was time to jump off and go play inside. so she jumped off and prompted me to follow her.

i was scared to jump.

so what did i do? i fell. i fell backwards landing on the grass behind me, and hitting my elbow on the concrete sidewalk to my left. broken elbow. what happened right after that moment i don't remember. i do remember being in the backseat of my parents car and driving to the hospital. i remember one of the nurses saying that they had to cut my dress off of me because they needed to see my whole arm. i was already upset and crying, and then to ruin my most favorite dress?! i was heart-broken. i remember them taking scissors and cutting open my dress while i was balling. i held Boo-boo (my stuffed panda bear) and just cried and cried. and then the nurse wanted to stick a needle in me to put me out for the surgery. i pleaded my case and told them that my mom could run her fingers up and down my back and that would put me to sleep. i said i didn't need the shot to go to sleep. unfortunately i didn't win, and got stuck with a needle.

i got a cast of course. and had to wear it for the rest of the summer and the beginning of the school year. i'm pretty positive that it was because of this broken arm that i do majority of everything right-handed, that is except for write. i write, left-handed. for whatever reason the doctor was unable to put the bone right in the correct place, so with that and cartilage built up i have a bump in my arm. my left elbow to be exact. i can do everything normal. it just looks funny.

and it is more noticeable as i've lost weight. i have more people notice it and ask me about it. to be honest it used to be a sore subject in middle school, when i was on the dance/drill team. in drill team we would do a line of kicks, and i was put next to ginger, and we had to link arms. she complained about my bump all the time. i hated her for it. she made me feel like something was wrong with me. not a good memory.

anyways. so that is the story about when i broke my left arm when i was 6. i realize it isn't a funny story. but still, a story.

what bones have you broken?

the end.

upper body/abs 30min
zumba 60min
628

remember this?

lately i've been feeling very nostalgic. thinking about life. my life 10 years ago. the simple times. the friends i had at the time. missing them. missing that connection.
during our final cool down on saturday the cool down song was this:
Baz Luhrmann - Everybody's Free (To Wear Sunscreen)
awesome song. it immediately took me back to that simple time. hearing the words 11 years later just about brings me to tears. enjoy.



Ladies and Gentlemen of the class of '97(i could have sworn it was '99/but what do i know?)... wear sunscreen.

If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be IT.

The long term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience.

I will dispense this advice now.

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they have faded. But trust me, in 20 years you'll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked.

You are NOT as fat as you imagine.

Don't worry about the future; or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubblegum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind; the kind that blindside you at 4pm on some idle Tuesday.

Do one thing every day that scares you.

Sing.

Don't be reckless with other people's hearts, don't put up with people who are reckless with yours.

Floss.

Don't waste your time on jealousy; sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long, and in the end, it's only with yourself.

Remember compliments you receive, forget the insults; if you succeed in doing this, tell me how.

Keep your old love letters, throw away your old bank statements.

Stretch.

Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives, some of the most interesting 40 year olds I know still don't.

Get plenty of calcium.

Be kind to your knees, you'll miss them when they're gone.

Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't, maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't, maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself, either. Your choices are half chance, so are everybody else's. Enjoy your body, use it every way you can. Don't be afraid of it, or what other people think of it, it's the greatest instrument you'll ever own.

Dance. Even if you have nowhere to do it but in your own living room.

Read the directions, even if you don't follow them.

Do NOT read beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly.

Get to know your parents, you never know when they'll be gone for good.

Be nice to your siblings; they are your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.

Understand that friends come and go, but for the precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography in lifestyle because the older you get, the more you need the people you knew when you were young.

Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard; live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.

Travel.

Accept certain inalienable truths, prices will rise, politicians will philander, you too will get old, and when you do you'll fantasize that when you were young prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders.

Respect your elders.

Don't expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund, maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse; but you never know when either one might run out.

Don't mess too much with your hair, or by the time you're 40, it will look 85.

Be careful whose advice you buy, but, be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia, dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it's worth.

But trust me on the sunscreen.

today after my workout i hung out with a new friend at her house. it was simple. and made me appreciate being older. because even though life is complicated being older you can just be yourself. and not stress. just hope that people will accept you for who you are without having to pretend. i have this comfort already with this friend, and i think that speaks very highly of what our friendship can become!

barbell strength 60min

a story about shoes

both of my parents are cheap. they are both cheap for different reasons. growing up my mom took me clothes shopping at wal-mart and shoe shopping at payless shoesource. i remember going to these 2 places annually in elementary school and middle school for back to school shopping.
i'm pretty sure it wasn't until i was in middle school that i actually went inside of a mall. i didn't even know what banana republic was, all i knew was that all the cool kids wore their t-shirts and i didn't have one. ...like what my friend emily is wearing here.
it was in middle school that i really learned about "brand names". one of which was keds. everyone had fancy white keds with the blue "keds" branded on the back of the shoes. i wanted a pair of keds. my mom said no. so on our trip to payless i saw, and tried on the cheap version of the white canvas shoes at payless. after trying them on and looking at the back hoping that the all important blue "keds" would show up on the back and seeing that it didn't i decided to go ask the sales lady at the front of the store. and in all honesty i had no idea what i was doing.
i went up to her and asked "do have kids?"
she replied "kids?"
i said "the shoes."
she said "oh the shoes? you mean keds."
me "yes, keds, sure whatever. do you have those?"
"no we don't carry those here."

i didn't even know how to say the word keds and so i walked away devastated and embarrassed.

mom and i walked out of the store with the plain white canvas shoes a.k.a. the fake keds. my solution to this problem? simple. take a blue pen and write "keds" on the back of my shoes. yes, i did this. i remember feeling so cool the next day walking to the bus stop, and then the cool 8th grader making fun of me for it. she asked "did you write keds on the back of your shoes?" my once brilliant idea of coolness and owning a pair of "keds" turned into everyone at the bus stop laughing at me.
i don't remember what happened after that moment, but i do still remember this happening like it was yesterday. of course i can laugh about it now but i was heart broken when it happened.

a few years later i did own an actual pair of keds. i can still remember trying them on and thinking "wow this is what it feels like to try a pair of shoes on that have an actual arch." because those shoes at payless, they were flat. no support whatsoever, but at that time i didn't know any better.

in fact, last summer i bought a pair of gray keds. i bought them because i could and because i don't buy my shoes at payless, and because i wanted those blue letters on the back of my shoes without me having to put them there! they are my go to casual/weekend shoe!

50/50 60min