Tuesday, April 12, 2016

End of Pregnancy

38 weeks

my entertainment at Mondays NST

The end of pregnancy is so hard to describe.  It is truly filled with every single emotion possible, especially since I have knowledge of this feeling as this is my second pregnancy.  How it seems like time is at a stand still as the days go by wondering when this little dude will make an appearance, but then knowing that once baby does come these last few days (weeks) of pregnancy will be a distant blur.  Having the realization that pregnancy doesn't last forever even though you feel that way, and that one day (soon, but who knows when?) it'll be over.
The huge difference this time around, of course, is truly not knowing when I'll have this baby boy in my arms.  With Helena's birth as a scheduled c-section I knew when I would be holding her.  This time I have no clue.  I'm definitely at peace of not knowing, but that doesn't mean I'm not curious and anxious.
Last week was super rough.  There was a play date last Tuesday at White Sands and I think climbing up in the sand and then going to Walmart in the afternoon where I had some contractions I just pushed myself too hard.  By early Wednesday morning I had some horrific hunger pains, although I wasn't hungry, and then I just had a horrible horrible stomach ache.  I kept having to go to the bathroom and felt extremely weak.  Thankfully my mom was on her way down for a visit to help with my last two most recent doctor appointments, and I called Chris to come home since I seriously couldn't move (besides from the couch/bed to the bathroom).  I then started throwing up.  I had no clue if I was in the beginning stages of labor (I obviously wasn't) or if I was just sick.  I seriously had zero energy and slept all day long, and if I wasn't sleeping I was on the toilet.  I couldn't even keep down gatorade.  I had a fever and felt absolutely horrible.  The worse I think was just feeling so weak.  I thought "If this is labor, no way can I do this."  I had both my mom and Chris worried about me since I was so out of it.  Thankfully baby was active all day, so I knew he was ok.  That was reassuring.  By Thursday morning I was able to eat some, and baby looked great at the doctors appointment on Thursday morning.  Who knows what it was, but thankfully it was short-lived and I feel fine now and have my energy back!
Now it's just a waiting game.  The doctor told me to do lots of walking and to sit on my exercise ball, which I've been doing both of.  While my mom was here, we prepped 10 freezer crock pot meals and I'm doing lots around the house this week in preparation of going into labor at any moment.  Plus lots of praying that this little babe will put me into labor so that way I don't have to be induced.
Helena handled her transition without the rocking chair super easy...almost too easily.  I cried like a baby.  She had one rough night, but she knows that the rocking chair is in her little brothers room.  Plus she likes all of her toys in her room...we moved her toys into the space where the chair was.  She's fascinated by baby brother's room, and wants to go in there all the time.
Now we wait.  My mom predicts that baby will come on 4/22 because it is a full moon.  And that date works fine for me, as my mom will be back in town on 4/20 (if she doesn't come sooner) and that gives my family one last weekend to enjoy as a family of 3.  I really do like my new doctor, and baby boy is happy and healthy and is passing all of his NST's and BPP's.  His heartrate is always in the 150's to 160's.  Some big differences with this pregnancy and Helena's: I got much more gasy much earlier on, with burps and stuff.  And his movement is not as consistent as what Helena was.  But now that I'm further along I of course feel him more.