Tuesday, August 31, 2010

everything new

friday night i went out with a couple of new friends. i really love going out on friday nights because it just make the weekend seem longer. i met thea and ruth at gordon biersch for some happy hour. this was right after i walked out of slimgenics all emotional and stressed, and a drink was much needed. thea teaches 50/50 at the gym and her friend ruth is also a fitness instructor in boulder and a OBGYN! both of these lovely ladies are single, so going out with them was different. we got to talk about guys and dating, and single life in general.

after our happy hour festivities we walked around a little bit, and i had $100 burning a whole in my pocket. ...awhile back my boss gave me $50 amex card and i had a $50 visa rebate. so i asked the ladies if they would go shopping with me at the gap. something that i have learned is that when i go shopping i have to bring a friend along. i have no idea how to shop for this body that i have. no clue. i don't know when something looks too big, or too small, or what looks good. i've never had to dress myself at this size, so i was thrilled when thea and ruth joined me on my mini shopping spree. we walked through the whole store grabbing anything and everything for me to try on. this was another first. never had i been able to walk into a store and try on everything! so i tried stuff on, well just because i could. thea and ruth were a great help.

i bought a v-neck t-shirt, a dress shirt, and a skirt. the skirt is a size 14!!! a fourteen people! this is HUGE, ok well small in my eyes, but really truly HUGE! :) when i zipped up the skirt i came out of the dressing room and told thea and ruth that i just had another huge milestone, and they were there to celebrate this victory with me!

when i first started this journey i knew i would need new clothes. what i don't think i realized is that i'm going to need new everything. not just pants, tops, but pajama's, underwear, bra's, workout clothes, everything. when i went into slimgenics on saturday they took my measurements to compare them to what i was back in march when i started. i've lost 6 inches off of my chest, and needless to say i'm still wearing the same bra's when i was 85 pounds heavier.
it's kinda overwhelming, but i'm looking forward to my new wardrobe possibilities.
so i tried to find a pic of the skirt on the gap's website, but it isn't on there.
treadmill 32min
339

Monday, August 30, 2010

~something I love~

OPI nail polish
all of the colors are just so pretty.
lately my color of choice: bubble bath
so pretty.
it is because of this color that has caused me to love my nails.

**********

the other fabulous thing about OPI are the names.
the names of the polish are so original and fun!
i don't know about you, but i always look at the color of the nail polish,
and that decides whether or not if i like the color.

**********

what's the name of your favorite nail polish?
80's jam 75min
608

Sunday, August 29, 2010

not in the mood

but so much to update you on:

shopping

my weekend

another realization

i'll get around to it eventually.

but for right now, i'm going to stay with short and sweet.
STRIKE! 60min

week 22: i'm in control

so i'm taking a break. a break from slimgenics. but not a break from losing weight. lately i've gone into slimgenics and left feeling negative and urges to eat all things bad. and in reality i should be leaving feeling the exact opposite and motivated. so i've been super frustrated to say the least.

slimgenics is known for giving each one of its clients a "customized meal plan" when in really slimgenices only offers 3 different types of meal plans. when i originally signed up i was told to be on plan 2. so i did plan 2. slimgenics is a plan based strictly on food and diet. they of course promote some moderate exercise and they do encourage it but it isn't mandatory. when i signed up for this plan i told the manager that i work out 5 days a week, explained to her the details of my workouts and their intensity. she was encouraged by it, and advised me to keep up with my workouts. early on in the program one of the nutritionists asked me how many hour a week i workout. i had never really logged the time on a week by week basis, so i told her probably between 5 - 7 hours a week. she advised me to log it and that we would look at it in a week or two. ...their is a spot on my daily food diary to put in exercise, plus i'm usually in my workout clothes when i go into slimgenics. the other question i would normally get from the staff at slimgenics if i ever felt "hungry" or if i felt like i was getting enough food. i advised them that the beginning was the hardest but that i've learned to manage out my food throughout the day so that i don't feel like i was starving. ...of course this was also the time that i started cheating more frequently and not writing down my cheats!
then last week i asked about the different plans. i read through all of my slimgenics info and read about plan 3. so i asked what determines whether or not a person goes on plan 3? i was told that anyone who works out more than 5 hours a week. so then the conversation was about possibly moving me to plan 3, and the food detailed in this plan. i thought maybe it was a good idea. when i got home i thought more about it, and got mad. i got pissed actually. especially because i know i've been getting more hungry lately since i've been doing weights.
then i went in on friday and was upset at my lack of weightloss results. we talked more about plan 3, and i started cry, because i felt as if i should have been put on this plan from the very beginning. i feel that i had started with this plan and gave my body the food that it needed, i wouldn't have cheated as much as i have, and would have been further along in this weight loss journey. granted we can plan the what if game for forever, but that's just what i feel. i think had i been more honest with my food journals, and maybe put the clues together about why i was being asked about how much time i spend working out and if the food that i'm eating is filling me up, i could have been switched to plan 3 earlier. on friday i stormed out of slimgenics upset and crying and not wanting to yell, so i left.
i spoke to my mother about it, and she said the most perfect thing. she said "april, you've given them too much power. you need to take your power back." so that is exactly what i'm doing. this my journey, my life. my mom also stated that their are hundreds of ways to lose weight. and that this isn't the only way. i've been doing this plan for 22 weeks now, which is more than 5 months. my weight loss journey isn't what the average slimgenics client goes in for, which is 30-40 pounds. it is 120 pounds. so mixing things up i think is necessary. i did the first 40 pounds completely on my own, i've done 45 on the slimgenics plan, and the last 35 will come off somehow. i'm not too sure how because i haven't gotten rid of it yet, but i know that i will lose it. when i explained all of this on saturday i was supported. i think that the people at slimgenics understand that for those of us who have a longer journey to fulfill these breaks are good for our success. ...this is what i'm telling myself anyways.
since saturday i already feel better and lighter. i feel more in control. i don't feel so much pressure on my shoulders, and i feel more lively. i feel that once i'm back from vacation next week, i'll be that much more motivated to go back into slimgenics and finish this journey. now like i said just because i'm not checking in with slimgenics 3 days a week, doesn't mean i'm allowed to eat whatever i want. i'm not taking this "break" to sabotage myself. i'm taking this break to show myself that i can do this. so i'll still give my blog it's weekly update as normal, really the only thing changing is me going into slimgenics 3 days a week. that's it.
with all of that being said. i lost 3 pounds this week. which is 2 new pounds lost. given the sweets i had this week along with the stress i feel i put on myself, 2 pounds is pretty good.
here's to me regaining my power!
the mixx 60min
-3lbs

Thursday, August 26, 2010

all kinds of crazy


i placed an VS order sunday.
i got this.
i hope i won't be disappointed.

********

on saturday i drove to the library with a
bee
in my car.
i didn't realize it until i parked.
my worse fear.
i'm pretty sure it was injured as it couldn't fly
and was stuck in my cup holder.

********

in general i'm a very neat eater.
but i have major issues eating
sunflower seeds.
i'm a hot mess eating those little things.

********

i'm really looking forward to watching
the new show
my generation.

********

yesterday while driving home
i saw a car with a Rhode Island
license plate.

********

guess what?
i'm actually busy this weekend.
i have plans tomorrow night,
saturday morning,
saturday afternoon,
saturday evening,
and sunday morning.

********

saturday night while
grocery shopping
i saw this man wearing a t-shirt that said:
i survived Y2K.
doesn't that seems like eons ago?

********

i love breakfast.

********

i got this message from a facebook friend last week
and i want to share it
just to keep myself motivated
and to end on a positive note:
"I'm so proud of you April. I think most people (me included) keep complimenting you on your fitness goals. But it's truly who you are inside that is absolutely beautiful! I'm proud of you for stepping out of your comfort zone (on many levels) and living life to its fullest!"
make me cry.

********

STRIKE! has a VIP club
and i'm soooooooo
in it!

********

STRIKE! 60min
618


Tuesday, August 24, 2010

3rd annual: Race for the Cure


Hello friends and family, it is that time of the year for me to ask for your support in my fight against breast cancer, and Race for the Cure. last year as i prepared for my 2nd race for the cure event, i found out that my aunt ruby was diagnosed with this horrible disease. thankfully it was caught early and 11 months later she is in remission! each year this event gets even more special to me, which makes it that much more emotional. This year I'll be participating in 2 races! Denver's race for the cure on october 3rd, and Albuquerque's race for the cure on october 10th! i love this race. and i hope to make it a tradition for many many many years to come. if you would like to make a donation of the monetary kind please click on the link below to my personal page, then click on "support April", otherwise your donation of happy thoughts on my race days is just much needed and appreciated! thank you all in advance!
*****************************************************************

Dear Friends, Family, and Co-workers,
This will be my 3rd Race for the Cure event! I look forward to this 5k run/walk every year as it is so powerful, emotional and fun. So much fun, that this year I will be participating TWICE! Along with the Race for the Cure event in Denver, one week later, I'll be in my home town of Albuquerque, NM to support their Race for the Cure event as well! With two races, I hope to raise double in Breast Cancer Awareness.
I walk in memory of my Grandma Madrid who battled the disease more than 15 years ago.
I fight for my Aunt Ruby who was diagnosed with breast cancer last winter, and is still fighting.
Thank you so much in advance for your thoughts,
April Madrid
P.S. If you are in NM and would like to join my team, please let me know and I'll get you the information.


The fight against cancer goes on. In today's society everyone knows someone who has been touched by breast cancer. Whether it's a friend or relative, someone in your circle has battled breast cancer. I have found a way to fight against cancer- through the Susan G. Komen Denver Race for the Cure®.

I will be dedicating my walk to my Aunt Ruby, who is currently battling breast cancer.

The Komen Denver Race for the Cure® is a community event that honors and memorializes breast cancer survivors, co-survivors and those that have lost to the disease. The Race also plays a vital role in raising funds for research, education, prevention, advocacy and treatment. Each year over 1.3 million people take part in Race for the Cure events around the world. I will be joined by thousands of others October 3, 2010 at the Pepsi Center. (and October 10, 2010 at Isotopes Park.)

How can you help?
You can support me by making a tax-deductible contribution to Susan G. Komen for the Cure. If you would like to donate, please visit my personal page to make a donation to my efforts. You may also call me with the amount you will be pledging and can send the donation, payable to the Susan G. Komen Denver Race for the Cure, to the address below. I must have all donations by October 29, 2010. Please make your check payable to Komen Denver Race for the Cure and add my name in the memo.

Komen Denver Race for the Cure®
1835 Franklin Street
Denver CO 80218
Attn: Pledges

Additionally, you can join me at the event as a walker, runner or volunteer for the event. There are many ways to join in on the fight to end breast cancer forever. Go to komendenver.org for more information.

Thank you for supporting the fight against cancer!

My registration fee gets me to the start line...your donation gets us to the cures.

Click here to visit my personal page.
If the text above does not appear as a clickable link, you can visit the web address:
http://www.komendenver.org/site/TR/Race/General?px=1526091&pg=personal&fr_id=1100&et=VVYI3uxutvtPyml8dTpCWA..&s_tafId=30584

Click here to view the team page for The Doers
If the text above does not appear as a clickable link, you can visit the web address:
http://www.komendenver.org/site/TR/Race/General?team_id=47730&pg=team&fr_id=1100&et=YyA1JK9zqlRFlXT9aI9FtA..&s_tafId=30584

barbell strength 60min

Monday, August 23, 2010

heavy lifting

so lately i've incorporated some weights back into my workout routine. i did this by adding the class "barbell strength" to my weekly routine. and now all of a sudden it seems as though i'm doing weights all the time. everything with me always seems to circle around back to food, which is one of the reasons why i like lifting weights. the more muscle mass you have, the more calories your body burns, the more you can eat! i have a co-worker april who i actually met at the gym before realizing we work in the same group at Qwest, and her husband bobby is a crazy muscle dude that is seriously like 2% body fat. anyways april recently sprained her ankle and has asked me to join her in lifting weights since she can't really do a lot of cardio. well i was suppose to met up with her saturday morning, but that didn't work out, and instead i did weights by myself. it had seriously been so long since i had done any sort of free weights on my own, that i rather enjoyed it. then yesterday after my 50/50 class sarah invited me to do some weights with her and bobby. now i met bobby through april(they are husband and wife), and at first look you think this guy would be super intimidating. but the beauty is that he isn't. both april and bobby are super nice and genuine. the muscle's for yesterday's workout: triceps and shoulders. here i am doing triceps with a 25 pound bar, sarah is at a 35 pound bar, and bobby?


wait...



just wait for it...








keep waiting....
110 pound bar!
he can do an entire set with a 110 pound bar! another thing to keep in mind about bobby, he's 5'2''.
insane, right?! abso-freakin'-lutely!

but working out with these two was actually a lot of fun. i didn't care that i was the weakest, i just cared that i was working out in good company. and because bobby is crazy ripped and sarah is a personal trainer they gave me some good pointers, and helped me work on my frame and form, which are two very important things when it comes to lifting weights.
at the end of the workout we did shoulders, and april joined us.

then tonight i did some more weights with april before my zumba class. we worked our back and biceps.
all of these weights, and tomorrow is barbell strength. i hope i survive!
back/biceps
zumba 60min
488

Sunday, August 22, 2010

i'm trying

i'm trying to put myself out there. i suppose this is a little egotistical to say, but to be honest apart of me expected that once i lost some weight i would all of a sudden be dating a bunch of guys. that guys would approach me, and talk to me. that they would somehow be able to see the hard work i've done, and be that much more attracted to me, and want to get to know me. of course this hasn't happened, and i'm not really surprised that it hasn't, but i am a little bit disappointed.
i had a rough evening friday evening and yesterday. lately i've been getting the itch to date. i just want to go out on a date, but not only that. a good date. which of course is asking a lot, and i realize that. i've been on a lot of first dates, and hardly ever are they good, but i've been lucky and i have experienced a handful of good first dates. but at the same time dating is scary. but lately i've just been craving that attention. i've been wanting to get my flirt on! ;)
the radio station that i listen to put on a special event on friday, putting together single guys and ladies, and i dragged along my one single co-worker with me to go the festivities in hopes of finding a date. the event was called "erica's mile of men". erica is on the morning show, and she had about 50 guys lined up outside elitch garden's friday morning holding numbers, while ladies were able to drive by the men, chat with them, then meet them at jackson's downtown for a little happy hour mixer later that afternoon. the morning event was actually a lot of fun. yes it was awkward, but i do so much better one on one. i was definitely attracted to a handful of the guys and was looking forward to having more time with them at jackson's. to prepare for the happy hour event i changed into my new dress! i was super excited to wear it. this event started at 5pm, which was when julie and i got there. like any social get together it usually takes a couple of hours for things to get really hopping and to feel the energy. well time wasn't on our side. julie had her nephew's birthday dinner to attend, so we only stayed until 6:30pm. unfortunately that wasn't enough time to really make a connection with anyone. we did approach a group of the guys, but they actually blew us off. and the guy to girl ratio was definitely in favor of the guys. their were easily 4 girls to every 1 guy there. so i was home by 7pm friday night, all dressed up and cute, with nowhere to go. for the first time in a long time i actually felt lonely. that feeling carried over into yesterday, although not as bad. i have a coworker that lives super close to me, and we did a walk/jog yesterday morning. i was suppose to meet another coworker to do weights at the gym, but the walk/ jog took longer that what i was anticipating, so i did some weights by myself, and spent the rest of day wanting some sort of human interaction to just be alone. it was an unwelcome feeling.

here is julie and i ready to go mingle!
but today was a good day. today was a perfect combination of human interaction and alone time, which is what i'm used to, and is in my comfort zone, so i liked it. this morning i slept in and did 50/50 which is at 10:30am. i ran into sarah at the gym, and she invited me to lunch when class was over and when she was done with her client at 11:30am. well come to find out our friends bobby and april were there doing weights, so we joined them is some weight training. needless to say we didn't leave the gym until after 1pm. after sarah and i ate i came home changed and immediately went back to the gym to lay out at the pool. this weekend was hot, and i loved it! i'm going to miss lounging at the pool so much! it is such a relaxing time. i'm sad that the summer is coming to a close.

to wrap up, i'm working on putting myself out there. on trying to be open to dating. if anyone has any tips on how to do that, i'm open to all comments and suggestions! thanks!
50/50 60min
423
triceps and shoulders

Saturday, August 21, 2010

week 21: fried food

fried fish, fried shrimp, french fries, spring fling cake, pasta salad. these are foods not on plan. these are foods i have consumed this week. what's a girl to do? blame her period, of course. makes sense, right? well of course i can't blame that factor alone. i'll also blame my poor planning. even though food this week was bad bad and even more bad, my workouts were good. and majority of the food in between the bad food was good food. with all of those things combined, resulted in a 1 pound gain. all things considered, i am happy. well happy isn't the right word, but i'm not going to beat myself up over it. i'll move on to the new week, and focus on that.

i wish i could go back to that feeling of when i first started this plan. when cheating wasn't an option. where i was still learning the details of the plan, had the excitement of doing something new. being excited over seeing results every time i went into slimgenics. you know kinda like when you start a job. you work really hard to do good at it, to get results, to impress your boss, your peers, yourself. you feel proud and excited when you meet your accomplishments. i had all of those feelings when i started slimgenics. i'm trying to get my head back at that mental place of the beginning. because that's when i feel i was the strongest. obviously their is no going back in time (if only) but i can get that excitement back. i know i can do it. i've lost 43 pounds on this plan in 21 weeks, 2 pounds a week. not bad. but just imagine what the numbers could have been had i fully followed plan? had no mix ups? coulda woulda shoulda. but this life. life is full of mix ups. regardless of how much you plan. nothing goes as planned. i will continue to try. and i will finish this journey. i've been deviating a lot from plan. selecting food not on plan, but food that is still healthy and low calorie/low fat. i feel like i'm teaching myself what life will be like once i begin the maintain phase. which is great, but i'm not on the maintain phase yet. i'm still in the lose weight phase. so yes, i am feeling good that i'll be able to maintain. but i need to finish losing first. which has created this cycle i'm in, this cycle of sabotage. i need to find the motivation in me to get back to what i paid these people for. to teach me what to eat. simple, right? the simple answer, is yes. onward and upward i go.
4.5 mile jog/walk 60min
532
abs/legs/arms/back - weights 30min

+1lb

Thursday, August 19, 2010

all kinds of crazy

do you see something new in this picture
that wasn't there before?
for the longest time i've been wanting to get a
second hole in my ears.
i finally did it while tina and i were downtown saturday!
i'm excited to wear all of my fun earrings.

********

i can feel my ribs!!!

********

yesterday morning while brushing my teeth
i was making my bed,
saw two spiders,
and killed them.
all while brushing my teeth!
yes, i can multi-task!

********


today was the first day at work
all week where i didn't wear my jacket
because i wasn't freezing.

********
this is the dress!
i'm wearing it tomorrow at the
"mile of men" happy hour mixer!
i knew i bought it for a reason.

********

i have never used a
red box.

********

after 30+ years of the same carpet.
my parents finally got new carpet in their house!
i'm so excited.

********

look, i'm semi-famous
on a super popular blog!

********

i really want to do this:
GNO ~ granny's night out!

********

i got the hick-ups twice in the past two days.
last night
and
this afternoon.

********
STRIKE! 60min
640

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

The Places I've Been: OK

Tulsa, Oklahoma

I know I've been to Oklahoma once, possibly twice and I don't remember the second time. My dad's sister and her family lives in Tulsa, OK. My parents and I went on our first big road trip to Tulsa when I was in middle school, I think? I honestly can't remember when this trip took place.

The drive took forever (in my mind anyways) and I remember being super exciting arriving at my my Aunt Ruby's house. I think my dad probably went fishing and one night we had a big fish fry.

What I remember very specifically about my stay in OK is chewing gum. I was in my aunts bathroom chewing bubble gum and for the first time ever I successfully blew a bubble with my gum! I was so excited! This was something I had been working on, and thought I would never be able to do. But then I went into the bathroom, stood in front of the mirror and focused on blowing a bubble with my gum. Once I accomplished blowing bubbles I went into the living room to show-off my new talent, and nobody cared! Of course now I realize that the talent of blowing bubbles with gum isn't really that big of a deal, but at the time I was impressed with myself! :) Needless to say now whenever I chew gum and blow a bubble I remember that exact moment in time in my aunts bathroom in Oklahoma.

Isn't weird how some random moments stay with us for forever?

Do you remember when you blew your first bubble with gum?
zumba 60min

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

taking the time



saturday afternoon while tina and i were downtown we went to go see the movie "eat, pray, love" i read this book back in november 2008. from what i remember of it, the book follows the movie pretty close. with that, i really enjoyed the movie. i think it is important to take time for yourself. whether it be a few extra minutes in the shower because you are a crazy busy mom, or you are alone all the time like myself, it's important to take that time and appreciate it. now i know how blessed i am to take these past couple years and focus on myself. but my friends who are wives and moms have different kinds of blessings. in the love from their husband, the touches and hugs from their kids. of course those things may never make an appearance in my life. i suppose what i'm trying to say is that we are all blessed in different ways.

back to the movie. the movie is about a woman unhappy in her marriage and decides to take a risk. she decides to leave all that she knows to travel, to be alone, and to get to know herself. if only all of us had the opportunity to take a trip around the world and travel for a year. when i read the book i immediately wanted to travel to where this woman went: italy, india, and indonesia. i hoped that the movie would show these places in a new light, but the movie didn't really do that. so with that i was a little disappointed. the visual didn't match the words of the book. during her travel she gets to try new food, experience different kids of faith, and find a true love.

lately when i've been home alone and all is quiet i've tried to focus on the fact that i'm not lonely, but that i'm alone. big difference. in the past i've definitely been lonely, which has caused some mild deppression. but i've gotten over that, and made my life what it is now without feeling lonely, even though for the most part i am still alone. i've grown to appreciate the silence while praying that it won't always be there. i'm focusing on making my life everything that i want, within the power that i have. to let go of the things that are not within my power.
treadmill 15min
barbell strength 60min

Sunday, August 15, 2010

everything in a few short days

my friend tina came to visit me over the weekend. it was a super short trip, but so much fun. tina flew into denver thursday afternoon, and departed back to floriday yesterday afternoon. tina and i have been dear friends for 11 years, and she knows my struggles with my weight and has seen pictures of my progress thus far. but at the airport when she saw me and we hugged we both started crying. it was unexpected for both of us. i remembered an earlier conversation with tina at the beginning of the summer when i was starting to really see results, and i asked her "can you believe i'm doing it?" she responded by saying "yes and no. no because i know how hard it is." tina and i can talk forever about anything and everything, but lately the main topic is living a healthy lifestyle. we always find new topics and ways to discuss eating healthy and working out.
this trip was super nice because it gave us the opportunity to have the time to talk about other topics going on in our lives. what's even better is i plan to go visit her and her family at the beginning of september, so we'll be able to pick up right where we left off.
from the airport we headed to denver, where a co-worker of mine threw a silpada party. tina is the "jewelry girl" and is a silpada representative.

the next day we got up and went to the Boulder Dushanbe Teahouse for breakfast. it was delish! this restaurant is gorgeous. beautiful tile and wood work everywhere. it was a treat.
inside the boulder teahouse
tina and i outside of the boulder teahouse
the weather was perfect for our morning hike! it was a lot of fun.
hiking in boulder


friday night i had a silpada party. i had a pretty good turn out and i had so much fun trying on all of the beautiful jewelry!
the trip was just what i needed. i love having visitors and having tina for a couple of days was so much fun.
50/50 60min
512

Saturday, August 14, 2010

week 20: saying it out LOUD

my head is full of topics all about weight loss. all about my journey, my successes, my failures. eating healthy, working out, getting to my goal = those 3 things occupy majority of my thoughts. i have my blog to help express everything. my frustrations, my celebrations, and everything in between. for the most part these are thoughts in my head, and then they become words in my blog. very rarely do i express what's going on verbally. yes i do have friends i talk with about what's going on, but then yesterday i read this post out loud to my friend tina that was visiting. as i was reading it, i started crying. then i read her the comments my readers wrote, and i cried some more. throughout this whole experience i had yet to let myself cry. ...i had felt a good cry coming, but that was so unexpected. while reading that post i remember feeling what i felt like at those low low points, and then allowing myself to cry tears of happiness for what i have accomplished since those moments.
because i am proud.
that's right, i said it. i am proud. :)
this journey hasn't been an easy one, and i'm slowly allowing myself to celebrate what it is that i have done. actually reading those words out loud, was such a different experience compared to thinking them in my head and actually typing them out. like saying those words out loud was like a whole other texture to the platform. does that make sense? i suppose that's another thing about this experience. it's definitely full of surprises. just when you think it is just eating healthy and working out, it is so much more than that. i'm learning to feel every part of this experience. to talk about it, to do it, experience it, remember it, read about it, everything.

the scale was nice to me this week. i'm down another 2 pounds! i'm loving august right now!

today i was in downtown denver walking around with my friend tina and we went into one of the little fashion boutiques in larimer square. you know one of those cute stores, with only a few pieces of any one item, over priced, and only carries up to size Large if your lucky? well i've been inside these stories many times with friends browsing and i've always found cute pieces but nothing that would even come remotely close to fitting me. well while searching through the items in this store i found a beautiful dress on the sale rack. i pulled off the size large held it up to me and immediately thought "no way, this won't fit." but i decided to give a go. i slipped it on, checked myself out in the mirror and almost immediately started crying.

it fit.
and you know what? it looks beautiful.
and you know what? i bought it.
i bought a cute summer halter dress from a cute little speciality boutique store in downtown denver called Violet. i wanted to scream! never in my life had this happened to me. never. it feels goooooood!
3mile run/walk 40min
412
-2lbs

Friday, August 13, 2010

a Witty request

poop.

hike 2hrs

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

what motivates me?

one thing i expect about this journey is to get questions. mainly the question of: how are you doing it? but i think i've only been asked that question once. weird. the main question i get, which i wrote about on saturday is "how do you feel?" this is a question i wasn't really expecting, and a question that i don't know how to answer. ask me "how are you doing it?" and i could talk forever about working out and eating right and the struggles that come along with working out and eating right. but ask me "how do you feel?" my first instinct is to say "i don't know".
a few weeks ago a woman see's me in the restroom at work and asked me "what motivated you?". now i see this woman probably everyday at work, and she often makes comments of "you look great" etc... i also don't really know this woman. we aren't in the same work group, we just happen to work on the same floor, and use the same restroom. when she asked what motivates me, i said "what doesn't?" because really, why wouldn't i WANT to be thinner? i feel like the reason's behind my weight loss are endless.
to be more comfortable
to live life more fully
to shop anywhere
to increase my chances of meeting my husband
lastly
to be healthy
i didn't have one A HA moment. i believe that nobody WANTS to be fat, and that every overweight person out there doesn't want to be overweight. and of course everyone has their own excuses for not losing weight. no need for me to go into those. i'm truly lucky because a lot of people use the excuse as time for lack of being active etc... i don't have that excuse, i never really have. i have all the time in the world. single, no kids, i do realize how blessed i am to be able to focus this time on myself. because i don't have any time to divide. i don't have a husband or kids to think about.
the other thing that rarely happens when you are an overweight person is actually seeing a success story. you see overweight people stay overweight. prior to last year the only successful weight loss stories i had personally seen with my own two eyes were people who went under the knife. then last a year a friend of mine did slimgenics, and i saw the results. everyone else i had seen lose weight had gained it all back. so finding motivation (besides the obvious) is hard.
so what finally happened for me to kick my ass into high gear and actually do it? well a few things. i definitely had some very low moments at my highest weight. one of which was realizing i was actually gaining. after aaron and i broke up i was depressed and eating a lot. not just eating a lot, but also eating out a lot.
at the end of 2007/early 2008 i was working four 10 hour shifts, 8am - 7pm, and had a 40mile commute, and had just starting working for the Union in my call center job. with various meetings throughout the day i would always have questions to ask my Union "boss", and since i had almost an hour drive home i would always call her when i got off of work to chat and ask my questions. during our conversations i would always stop at a local drive through and order dinner. after many conversations of asking my boss to hold so i could order food she once came on the line and said "do you ever cook?" that was one wake up call. it was shortly after that time that i gave myself the rule to not eat out during the work week.
another happened at an airport in florida. it would have been either the ft. lauderdale or tampa airport, i'm not sure. ...this is where my timeline gets hazy. i believe i was probably at my heaviest sometime between summer 2006 and summer 2008. anyways i was at the airport to return home from my annual florida trip. i was standing in line to board the plane and this little girl looks and points at me and tells her mom "look mom, that lady has a baby in her belly." she kept repeating it over and over. thankfully she wasn't saying it loud, and the mom was distracted having a conversation with someone else. another wake up call.
another low moment also happened at the airport, but this time inside the plane. this would have been either christmas 2006 or christmas 2007. i was flying to albuquerque for the holidays.
i couldn't get my seat belt buckled.
i was horrified. this had never happened to me before, and has never happened again. it was SO close, but i could not get my seat belt to buckle. it was winter, and i had with me my large winter coat. i was way too embarrassed to ask for one of those seat belt extenders, so i flew the whole way home with my coat over me, praying that a flight attendant wouldn't ask to see that my seat belt was buckled. huge wake up call.
lastly was sorta realizing i was actually gaining weight. seeing pictures i don't think i ever realized how much i gained, even though i obviously knew because of how i looked and having to go shopping to buy larger clothes. it's a very similar feeling with losing weight. weird i know. sorta like you don't know it's happening but it is because of the proof. but i remember when i was gaining my clothes feeling so tight and so uncomfortable. everything hurt. i remember when i finally gave in and bought new pants. thinking i had only gone up from a size 20 to 22, i was horrified when i realized that the 22's were also too big, and that i had to go to a 24. and now my clothes are uncomfortably too big. my size 16's are getting looser!
none of the above moments were the 'one' responsible for making me lose weight. but they are all reason's for why i started this journey. embarrassing to share with the blogging world?, absolutely. but i think it is important to share as i'm getting rid of the person who lived all of those moments. i think mentally putting all of these details out there is like shedding skin. yes, it was once part of my "imprint" and always will be, but the actual layer is gone.
i will say that it does feel great to be my own success story. although i still have 40 pounds to go i know that i'll get there. then the journey will take a new twist from losing to maintaining. because i know maintaining will be a completely different type of challenge. that i will still have to do what it is that i'm doing. along with the rest of the thin people in the world. it is somewhat comforting that all the thin people in the world really have to work to be thin too. which is true. have you ever been inside of a gym? majority of the people working out are thinner. why?, because they don't want to be fat. simple as that.
zumba 60min

Monday, August 9, 2010

question of the week:


i'm totally bummed that summer is going to an end. the days are already getting shorter and the mornings are darker. colorado summer's are just to short. kids are going back to school and fall just seems to be right around the corner. with that being said:

********
is august a summer month or fall month to you?


growing up i always considered august a fall month, because it was the month the school season would start. although i now know that it is technically a summer month, and one of the hotter months in colorado. but kids still go back to school, and relating hot weather with the school year seems weird to me. i try to convince myself that august is a hot summer month because i love summer.


********
so what do you consider the month of august? fall or summer?

zumba 60min
538

Sunday, August 8, 2010

bad a$$ chicks

post STRIKE! ~ all sweaty
sarah, me, pinder, cathy, and julie
~ yes we are bad a$$!

so today i felt like the ultimate cool girl. i brought 3 of my co-workers/friends with me to my STRIKE! workout! julie, cathy, and pinder all drove up to my neck of the woods to check out my workout! ...a few weeks ago i joined julie and cathy for a boot camp workout downtown, since i joined one of their workouts they joined me for one of mine! it is SO much fun working out with friends. it was awesome.
STRIKE! is one of my hardest workouts but it is also one of my funniest. STRIKE! is a kick-boxing cardio interval workout. the "intervals" bring you to zone 4 which is the point to where you completely breathless, where you just want to give up. thankfully the intervals are only a couple of minutes a piece, but it's what makes the workout hard. i remember when i first thought about trying out STRIKE! i had to mentally prepare myself for this class for about 4 months before i even took it. then when i did try it i wouldn't use the 1 pound gloves. that took about 6 months of mental preparedness. then about another 6 months before i would increase my weight for the body bar we use for the intervals. i started out at the 6 pound bar and am now up to the 9 pound bar.
i'm officially getting stronger. it's a slow process but it is happening, and i really enjoyed having my friends there today.
STRIKE! 60min
635

Saturday, August 7, 2010

week 19: goodbye obese!

...hello overweight! this is a huge milestone for me. my BMI is no longer in the category of "obese" and is now "overweight". obviously not where i want it to be, but it is a necessary step to where i'm headed. i was hoping to hit this milestone last month, but better now than never. it's crazy to think that i have spent majority of my life in that "obese" category. easily the last 17 years i've been obese. how gross is that?! but, not anymore. i'm officially overweight and on my way to the normal weight category. it is so weird that i'm on the final part of this journey.

lately a lot of people have been asking me how i feel. they'll say "i bet you feel great." or "i bet you feel so much lighter." and in all honesty i have no idea how i feel. yes, of course i feel good, but majority of the time i feel out of place. like i don't belong here. like i'm trying to learn some foreign language but i'm actually learning it, but don't know how to use it. like i'm trying to lose weight and i'm actually losing it, but now i don't know what to do or what to think, or how to react. so many people who are my age know the feeling of having been skinny at one point or another in their life. i don't know that feeling.
let me be honest though. i joined my first gym when i was 20. that was the first time i started working out. although never for more than 4 or 5 months at a time...until i started working out in november 2008. during all of my little stints at the gym and all the times in between i had never really watched my diet. i do think when you are working out you do make healthier choices in regards to your food, but prior to what it is that i'm doing right now i had never really put myself on a "diet". and i like to think what i'm doing now isn't a diet, but more so a way of life. i'm learning what to eat, and what my body needs. when i was as big as i was i had moments of thinking of weight loss surgery. but i knew one of the "requirements" was you had to exhaust all other forms of weight loss to qualify for the surgery. and i knew that in my gut i hadn't. because i knew i had never really watched what it is that i put in my mouth.

this journey although not over, has already taught me so much. and i'm so thankful for everything that i have learned. because i know that i will be and that i am a better person.

i'm down 3 pounds this week! i'm a little bit nervous because i have something picked out as my final congratulations to myself for hitting my goal weight, and it's planned while i'm in albuquerque the second weekend in october. i'm ok if i'm not exactly at my goal weight at that time, but i do want to be within 10 pounds of that. and in order to do that i have to stay on plan. which is nerve-racking. but this week was exactly what i needed. i needed a good number to help motivate me, and get my confidence back after a not too hot july. thankfully this week supplied me with just that.
strictly strength 60min
442
-3lbs

Friday, August 6, 2010

flashback friday ~ blog edition

so i'm thinking that pretty soon i'm going to close my myspace account because logging into it a few times a year, what's the point? i logged into myspace tonight, and checked out some stuff from my past. while surfing around i read a really old blog dated july 18, 2008 with the title: "my routine". i figured this would make a perfect post for flashback friday!
****************************************************************
So those that know me, know I remember dates, specifically since I have been oh about 20. But at my own embarrassment I'm going to go into much further detail, and I promise it will all come to a point at the end, but in order for me to get there I may ramble a little,...or a lot.

These "patterns" started when I moved to Denver. The first couple years I lived here, I traveled home a lot. Probably every chance I got, and majority of those times I would drive. It's about a 6.5 hour drive. And I would say about half of those trips were done by myself. I came up in my head, that each city has a parallel city. See:

Denver
Colorado Springs
Pueblo
Trinidad
Raton
Las Vegas
Santa Fe
Albuquerque

Driving North to South that is the order you reach each city. I imagine that if you have a map of just that area, and if you were to fold the map in half, the cities would match up.
Denver/Albuquerque
Colorado Springs/Santa Fe
Pueblo/Las Vegas
Trinidad/Raton
Do you see what I mean?

I do things in 2 hour increments during the drive. I try to start the first 2 hours listening to the radio-before I put in a CD. 2 hours until I start to use cruise control(this was only applicable for the last two trips.) One trip from my early years, I wrote down how many miles I traveled each hour. I prefer to leave at the top of an hour. So I can easily track my time. I love listening to soundtracks while on the road. It's the best way to listen to the whole soundtrack-specifically if it is for a musical. My favorite is "Blood Brothers". My all time favorite play. Last weekend I was home for my 10 year HS reunion. I've always wanted to see if I could travel all 460 miles without stopping. Well driving back to Denver, I succeeded! No stop for gas, and no stop for the bathroom.-this is another one of my "things". I drink a lot of water. While on the road I only allow myself one drink of water every 30-45 minutes. Because if I drank the amount of water I normally do, I would be needing to stop every hour to go the bathroom. So I very proud of myself, and my car!, for not stopping. And I love cruise control. It is great. I usually stop 4 hours into the trip. Las Vegas if I'm Southbound. Pueblo if I'm Northbound. I do this, because it is a little more then half way. And I've always been one to do things later, so the last part of whatever it is I am doing, goes quicker. Ok, I know I have some other weird habits while on my long drive, but that's all I can think of for now.

Moving on. The gym. I do the elliptical trainer for 45 minutes. This is a long time. And I have to keep myself entertained. This is what I bring with me when I'm doing my cardio. Water bottle, magazine, ipod, and headband.
The first 10 minutes I do nothing. Just run on the elliptical. I used to watch TV, but my eyes have gotten much worse, and can no longer read the print on the TV. So usually I stare at the numbers, and the person on the magazine cover for motivation-specifically face and arms. (The face for me, is usually the first place you can notice I am losing weight, and arms because I want thinner arms.)
After 10 minutes I put on my headband, to stop the sweat because this is when I really start to sweat. Then I drink some water.
I also about every 7-10 minutes reverse and go backwards for 1 minutes, always at a 30 second mark. For the first 10 seconds, I go as fast as I can-it helps the 60 seconds for faster(in my head).
10-15minutes I go back to doing nothing-just running.
Between 15-20 minutes, I put my ipod in my ears and turn it on, and start listening to music. 10-20 always seems to go a lot slower than the first 10 minutes.
I listen to music for about 15 minutes, then I start reading the magazine. I read the magazine up until I reach 40 minutes. At 40 minutes I put the magazine away, and do the cool down for the last 5 minutes. I think I put the magazine away at 40 minutes, because I like for the magazine to last me awhile(I'm cheap, and don't want to have to buy another magazine, and it's always a magazine, never a book.)
And at every 10 minute mark, I drink water. So, at 10 minutes, 20 minutes, 30 minutes, and 4 minutes. I try to go through a whole water bottle, but never the whole bottle. Then I always do my last 1 minute backwards at 42:30. Always. Again, a little bit more than half way through the cool down. Yesterday and today while doing cardio-I thought about this blog, all of the weird details I am now admitting to. This whole blog idea started yesterday when I was at the gym. I got on my machine to this guy who was crazy. I get on the elliptical that doesn't have the moving arm parts-and this guy turns all the way around on the machine, facing completely backwards, and he does that for maybe 2 or 3 minutes, and then turns back around, facing forward on the machine. He also at one point in time starting singing out loud, with his ipod. I wanted to laugh so hard, but didn't want to be rude(this was before I had started playing my own ipod). I had once read a magazine article(while working out) about gym etiquette. And one of things on there, was people singing out loud with their ipod. I thought in my head, no-no one would ever do that. Now, granted, it has been tempting at times, but I always stop myself. And I've been going to the gym on and off(mostly off) for 8 years, and I had never seen this happen. So when this guy start singing, it took all I had to not physically laugh out loud. And so the result of this guy singing, started the idea of this blog.

Do any of you have weird habits to help time go by? Or is it just me? I'm thinking it is just me, but I might just be pleasantly surprised.

So sadly, I think I lied. I'm pretty sure that after all of that, I made no point, just rambled. But I still hope that you enjoyed!


****************************************************************

very rarely do i have a workout on the elliptical anymore. but if i were to spend 45 minutes on that machine my routine is indeed exactly the same!
treadmill 60min
596

Thursday, August 5, 2010

all kinds of crazy



i' m loving my long nails right now.
they look so pretty.
but i have a feeling they won't last much longer.

********

taking pictures of your hands,
isn't an easy thing to do.

********

i have a case of
runner's toe.
weird.
for me it's the perfect excuse to go shoe shopping!

********

yesterday the bus i got on pulled over
onto the side of the road,
because it was dragging.
whatever that means.

********

i signed up for the
90 day weight loss challenge at the gym.
my goal is at the end of the 90 days,
i'll officially be done losing weight.

********

tonight for dinner i had a dairy queen blizzard.
mini-size.
it was a for a good cause:
miracle treat day
for children's hospital.
any excuse for ice cream!

********

i love my gym friends.
they are awesome.

********

i hate that the days are already getting
shorter.

********

today at work i met what
could be a new crush! ;)

*******

otis has been shedding like crazy.
i don't like it.
black cat hair all over my house.

********

next friday i'm throwing a
silpada party.
if you live in denver and want to come
let me know.
the more the merrier.

********

a quote for tori spellings new book:
"i'm working on my own happy ending."
yes, indeed i am.

********
STRIKE! 60min
659

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

remember this?

lately i've been feeling very nostalgic. thinking about life. my life 10 years ago. the simple times. the friends i had at the time. missing them. missing that connection.
during our final cool down on saturday the cool down song was this:
Baz Luhrmann - Everybody's Free (To Wear Sunscreen)
awesome song. it immediately took me back to that simple time. hearing the words 11 years later just about brings me to tears. enjoy.



Ladies and Gentlemen of the class of '97(i could have sworn it was '99/but what do i know?)... wear sunscreen.

If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be IT.

The long term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience.

I will dispense this advice now.

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they have faded. But trust me, in 20 years you'll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked.

You are NOT as fat as you imagine.

Don't worry about the future; or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubblegum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind; the kind that blindside you at 4pm on some idle Tuesday.

Do one thing every day that scares you.

Sing.

Don't be reckless with other people's hearts, don't put up with people who are reckless with yours.

Floss.

Don't waste your time on jealousy; sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long, and in the end, it's only with yourself.

Remember compliments you receive, forget the insults; if you succeed in doing this, tell me how.

Keep your old love letters, throw away your old bank statements.

Stretch.

Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives, some of the most interesting 40 year olds I know still don't.

Get plenty of calcium.

Be kind to your knees, you'll miss them when they're gone.

Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't, maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't, maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself, either. Your choices are half chance, so are everybody else's. Enjoy your body, use it every way you can. Don't be afraid of it, or what other people think of it, it's the greatest instrument you'll ever own.

Dance. Even if you have nowhere to do it but in your own living room.

Read the directions, even if you don't follow them.

Do NOT read beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly.

Get to know your parents, you never know when they'll be gone for good.

Be nice to your siblings; they are your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.

Understand that friends come and go, but for the precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography in lifestyle because the older you get, the more you need the people you knew when you were young.

Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard; live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.

Travel.

Accept certain inalienable truths, prices will rise, politicians will philander, you too will get old, and when you do you'll fantasize that when you were young prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders.

Respect your elders.

Don't expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund, maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse; but you never know when either one might run out.

Don't mess too much with your hair, or by the time you're 40, it will look 85.

Be careful whose advice you buy, but, be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia, dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it's worth.

But trust me on the sunscreen.

today after my workout i hung out with a new friend at her house. it was simple. and made me appreciate being older. because even though life is complicated being older you can just be yourself. and not stress. just hope that people will accept you for who you are without having to pretend. i have this comfort already with this friend, and i think that speaks very highly of what our friendship can become!

barbell strength 60min



Monday, August 2, 2010

surprise ending

****the bachelorette spoiler below****
















ali and roberto

so i have to say this was a shocker.
a few season's ago i discovered Reality Steve. this a website that has the spoilers of who the bachelor or bachelorette are going to pick at the end. the site is addicting, so unless you wanna know don't check it out. for ali's season in particular their were a lot of details and spoilers only 2 weeks after the season starting airing. this guy knew everything. the details of all the dates and who went home at each rose ceremony. knowing what's going to happen didn't stop me from watching because i still wanted to see it happening and all the little details.
the main prediction for this season was the outcome. that being that ali is single. that she chose no one. once i read that, i immediately became uninterested in the season, but still watched.
then i checked the link today and read that the prediction was wrong. that ali sends chris home prior to the rose ceremony (which is why we didn't see any footage of the 2 guys at the last rose ceremony) and that she picks roberto. i totally wish i hadn't read that, because that would have been such a great surprise. needless to say i hurried home after my workout to get caught up and see how it all played out. i totally see that ali loves roberto. and i'm happy for them, and happy that ABC was able to make the ending such a surprise. while reading steve's predictions he gave very creditable reasoning, clues, and hints, that ali was single.
i have only watched the last 10 minutes of after the final rose, but roberto and ali seem happy, and i hope it works out.
i love chris. he looks like an ex of mine, but much better looking because he has a much better personality than my ex from 9 years ago.

watching this show forces me to reflect on my life. and the love that i want in my life. the love that i crave. i realize that i'm on this journey right now, that centers around me, focuses on me, and making me better. healthier, stronger, more confident. but it doesn't mean i don't want someone to share it all with. i like to think that i've taken the past couple of years to soley focus on myself in preparation for love. for that man i will love and will love me. but of course, that isn't a guarantee. all i can do is continue what it is that i'm doing. keep going on this path. continue to pray and to hope that maybe a true and deep love will enter my life. that one day this piece of my puzzle might show up for me to put together. or maybe that piece isn't meant to be for me. that all of my puzzle pieces are here, and my life is about me fine tuning those pieces. making them the best that they can be.
zumba 60min
576

Sunday, August 1, 2010

a new title

April Madrid - Zumba Instructor

seriously who woulda thunk it?! ...not me, that's for dang sure.

yesterday i went and got my zumba certification. the class was all day long. it started off with an hour zumba class, then the break down of 4 of some classic zumba moves and rhythm's. in between all of that was lots of information about the zumba family and teaching. the group of women there were so dynamic! a few had instructor backgrounds, some were there to be subs, and a couple of ladies in there were probably in there 60's i would guess! how awesome is that?!
out of all the ladies i spoke with none were living in colorado. the instructor that taught the class is from salt lake city, i met another girl who came to take the class from sandy, UT, another girl was from Wyoming.
i really enjoyed the whole experience yesterday. so much fun, and so much energy. i'm excited and optimistic about where this whole thing will take me. their is a whole zumba family out there, and i'm officially now part of it!
along with now being an official licensed zumba instructor i am also a ZIN member: Zumba Instructor Network. i'll get zumba music every month and zumba choreography every other month. so many tools right at my fingertips!
the instructor that led the class talked about having a "zumba glow" after attending a zumba class, and that's so true! it's a great way to just let go, release, and forget life for 60 minutes. i learned so much, and i'm looking forward to growing and making this my own thing.
one thing that i was wrong about was the actual choreography. i was under the impression that all the dances already had their own choreography, but that isn't true. basically use whatever moves you would like with the music to put together a dance. one last exercise we did yesterday was to make up a dance. we had to listen to the music, then read the music, and create 4 dance moves. the break down of the whole "formula" is pretty interesting. the nice thing about it, is that it is easy. no rocket science here. the key is to use basic steps.
tomorrow night i'm going to zumba at the gym, and i'm excited to take my new found knowledge and participate in a class. i know i'll come out with new insights and ideas. i can't wait!
50/50 60min
treadmill 17min
603