Sunday, September 12, 2010

week 24: being honest

well as you can tell i only worked out once last week. not good. but, i was on vacation. ...more to come on that later.
what's worse is that i let slimgenics completely out of the door. adios. remember when i said i was taking a "break" from slimgenics but that i planned to stay on plan? that didn't go so hot.
i've thought about this blog for the past few days and about what i would say. i thought about not writing an update at all, about saying i was giving up. i thought about being dishonest and writing out something positive rather than negative. yes, i realize i've been on this downward spiral for about 2 months now. and that all of my weekly updates have been just about the same. i know that nobody wants to hear (read) the same thing over and over again. about how difficult this is, how i challenge myself not to cheat, how i will stay on plan, how something needs to change etc...
it has been the same thing over and over again, week over week. i'm sick of it, and i imagine that you are too.
and this week is no different. although this week has been the worse. i gained a lot. so much that i don't want to share it, so i'm not going to. i'm just going to move on. i'm also pretty confident that my goal weight will also change, but i haven't 100% decided on what yet. once i know, i'll share that too.
what i do want to share is my plan of attack. my plan is start over. completely over. i plan to go into slimgenics this week and hopefully get their support on this decision. i plan to start with the 3 day prep period, and begin brand new. act as if i'm a new client. i've already started mentally preparing for this, because i do know the plan, and i know the difficulties that come with it. but when i first started this plan, i didn't give myself the option of cheating, because it wasn't an option. plus this go 'round i'll be on the right plan. so i feel that it will be easier to stay on plan.
the other thing i'm also preparing for is how to incorporate this new plan to my new social life. my goal is to be start over, and be done by mid november. 8 hard weeks. 8 weeks is nothing. when i first started this slimgenice journey i didn't really have a social network. that has changed. i know i'll want to continue to go out with my friends and be social during the next 8 weeks. but i know the importance of staying on plan. so yes, i will go out, but i am going to try and not say "yes" to everything. especially the first few weeks.
so this is the plan. starting next week. yes, i am putting it off another week, and i'll tell you why. the main reason is because i want to start my prep period on the weekend. not during the week. secondly because i don't remember the full details of the prep period to begin today(slimgenics is closed on sunday's). lastly i'll be getting my monthly gift this week, and i know that will give me some sweet tooth cravings, and why would i want to torture myself with starting a strict diet?! :)
once i get started losing some weight again, i'll update my numbers and my little number graph at the bottom of my blog.
core 30min
strike! 60min


Blubeari said...

Being honest with bloggy world is a huge step... that is definitely progress!! Good luck with your new start. :-)

the emily said...

So. I think where my problem with all this would come in is the "cheating" part. I do NOT do well with restricting myself. My friend Tori who is a registered dietitian and my current personal trainer says that people who restrict themselves always fail. Now, those are her words, not mine, and I am NOT trying to be a downer here. I'm just telling you that I would have a hard time with every off-plan food making me feel guilty. I don't restrict anything, I just eat what I want in moderation. I'm glad that you're going to work hard these next 8 weeks. Good luck! But please don't feel guilty every time you have a Hershey's kiss. They're not that bad.

Nikki said...

A fresh start is always a good way to keep moving forward, that is a good idea. I think one thing you don't mention is how far you come. I am so proud with how much progress you have made. You are a rockstar and have worked so hard. Remember that and be proud and continue on this journey and new life you've formed for yourself.

Anonymous said...

Exactly what Nikki said! You have come so far, April!! And you NEED to be PROUD of that! I think your plan is a good one. Do not think of this as failure, because it is soooo far from that.. This is still progress and discovering what works and what doesnt part of the process. Starting fresh next week will be a good thing. So what if reaching your goal is postponed a month, or even two?!? The journey and lessons learned will be worth the wait. You just stay determined and focused and you will get there before you know it. 8 weeks is nothing, compared to all the months you have been working on this.. You are on the home stretch, April!!! I love you!! -Kari

sarahlove said...

Sometimes it's best to retrace your steps to find out where you lost track.

sarahlove said...

Sometimes it's best to retrace your steps to find out where you lost track.

Jimmy said...

Not sure I understand--the program works for you. You've lost weight. Why are you frustrated with slimgenics when no matter how you look at it, it worked? Whatever the plan was, it worked. Anyone who reads your blog sees that.

And I'm not sick of hearing about it. I find it inspiring. It's a hard thing you are doing. Might as well look for the positive.