Waste and Learning

I hate wasting …anything.  Time, energy, things, materials, money.  I hate the amount of Styrofoam cups our floor goes through.  I know of people who will take one cup fill it with water drink it then throw the cup away, just to do the same thing over and over throughout the day.  Such a huge waste, and it seriously makes my skin crawl.  I hate having a conversation and getting nothing accomplished.  I hate getting lost because of the lost time on the road and the wasted gas.  What I hate the most about waste is I feel for the most part you can’t ever get it back. 

I had a moment of pure waste over the weekend, and I’m trying so hard to not beat myself up about it because now that it’s done nothing can be done except for me to get over it! 

Chris and I did wake up early Sunday morning and drove down to Cherry Creek to do our run.  To only turn around and walk back to our car.  One thing I don’t like about races is the organizational part.  Lots of people, blocked off roads, parking.  Usually they aren’t very organized.  I’ve found that if you do the same race more than once you can get a good idea of how to be prepared for the cluster of: people, roads, parking.  I think this is why I find myself doing the same races year after year. 

Anyways the 5k was set to start at 8am. We had to parked at around 7:45am and started our pretty long walk to the start line.  I could tell the race had already started when we had to wait for runners in order to cross the street.  This event has multiple races, so with that were different start times and courses.  By the time we finally made our way up to the start another race had already begun and the start of another was underway.  The next race to go was a 5 mile.  No way would I have convinced Chris to do this with me, and I definitely wasn’t mentally prepared for a 5 mile course.  So we turned around and walked back to our car.  I wasn’t happy.  I was frustrated, disappointed, pissed-off, and upset.  I kept telling myself “What a waste!  A waste of time.  A waste of money.  A waste of energy.”  I felt defeated walking back seeing huge groups of runners cross the finish line.  I was looking forward to that feeling.  It’s been such a long time since I’ve had that feeling, and I wanted it back, and I wanted to feel it with Chris.  I wanted to enjoy the block party afterwards, which I knew Chris would enjoy.  Rarely do I get to enjoy the block party because I usually do races by myself and just go straight home afterwards. 

Unfortunately my biggest lesson in this experience is to continue with what I know.  To do races by myself.  This isn’t Chris’ thing and although I would love to do these types of things with another person, I’m better off by myself.  It’s hard enough for me to get up and motivate myself let alone someone else.  One thing I was hoping to accomplish with doing this race is to get me back on track with working out, running, losing weight.  That’s another big reason about why I was so frustrated.  While walking back to the car I was telling myself “why bother?!”  “what’s the point?”

Once we got back to the car we felt breakfast was in order.  And since we were in a different neighborhood we headed to Jelly.  The restaurant had an awesome atmosphere, and I had one of the best pancakes ever: a tres leche pancake.  SO good. 

After breakfast we went home, changed real quick and headed to Boulder to walk along the Pearl Street Mall and check out the tulips.  While on the drive to Boulder I decided to take this opportunity to register myself for the Bolder Boulder.  I was proud that I quickly got over my little pity party from earlier in the day, and decided that I wasn’t going to let my non-race experience stop me from doing the other races I had said I was going to do.  So I’m officially set to do my second ever Bolder Boulder race!  I don’t feel prepared at all to do a 10k, but am going to dedicate myself this month so I feel I can complete it in the same time as last year.  Of course the goal is always to do better, but I’ll feel it to be a victory if I accomplish this race in 80 minutes like last year. 

So my Sunday wasn’t a complete waste.  Chris and I had a full day.  Saw some beautiful sites and had quality time. 

Then yesterday I registered myself for the Mother’s Day 5k.  This will be the 3^rd time I’ve done this race.  And honestly I’m really looking forward to it.  I know exactly what to expect, where to park, and I am familiar with the course.  While we were walking back to the car on Sunday watching all of the runners, I pointed at them and told Chris that’s what I was looking forward to.  Running with people.  That’s what motivates me.  It gives a great feeling inside to know that I’ll be running with people on Mother’s Day.