Thursday, November 19, 2015

Oops we did it...again!

I'm feeling very nostalgic today and now that we have our computer up and running and a sleeping baby taking a nap I'm going to write a post about my beautiful friend Andrea. 

Andrea and I met in March 2012.  I was newly engaged and planning my wedding and already feeling so overwhelmed.  I didn't know it at the time but I was yearning for a friend, a friend that would know exactly what I was going through.  Someone who could listen and know what I mean.  I truly believe that at that moment God sent me Andrea.  Andrea too was newly engaged.  I can't remember if she had her wedding date set yet?...which is one big difference between Andrea and I, but once I met her and she told me she was planning her wedding a wave a relief swooped over me.  We met at work, and her cubicle was near mine.  I was ease-dropping when I heard her say she was engaged, I immediately got so excited, my heart start racing, and I wanted to run over give her a huge hug and say: Oh My GOD me too!!!  But I kept my cool, I think I somehow introduced myself and engaged with her and the fact that I too was engaged. 
From there, I guess you could say the rest is history.  We planned our entire weddings together.  I knew her wedding "secrets", she knew mine.  We both stressed over little things and family drama.  She was the exact person I needed in my life, right at that time.  Our friendship was just meant to be.  I can't put it more simply than that. 
We both dealt with what I guess I'll call the "wedding blues".  The low that happens after your get married.  After the big "to do" of the wedding.  Basically we both had these weird issues going on during the first couple months of 2013.  I remember having breakfast with her on my birthday that year, and it was not a super happy time for either of us.  Again, it was so nice to have her there and to know that she could somewhat relate to what I was feeling at that time.  I got to see own relationship with God grow as Chris and I became more and more comfortable in our new church.
I remember going to her over the summer that year, being frustrated about not getting pregnant. 
Then I remember the day after Labor Day 2013, waiting for her to get to work (I always got to work before she did), and once she arrived I immediately IMed her "Hey, do you want to go for a walk."  Once past the first corner around our building I exclaimed "I'm pregnant!"  Her response was something like: "No fu*!ing way, me TOO!"  We took a short walk around the building, and I couldn't believe we were pregnant at the same time!  Feelings of this friendship being meant to be swooped over me once again.  We spent our whole entire pregnancy together.  Our due dates were 2 weeks apart (just like our weddings were two weeks apart).  It was truly magical.  Her due date came and went and I hade Helena at 39 weeks, so Grayson and Helena are just 5 days a part.  I remember going to meet Grayson when I was still pregnant (Grayson was 3 days old, I think?).  Andrea said how motherhood is so amazing, and how your newborn child just knows.  Knows that you are their mother, that you are their for them unconditionally.  It was a beautiful and profound statement that I still carry with me to this day. 
Having our babies together so close in age is something magical.  She truly knows exactly what I'm going through.  If I have a bad day, she can relate.  She can relate in the love and the beautiful moments of seeing your little being grow.  In the same time! 
Then this, then this happened:
At the beginning of August Andrea and Grayson were over for a playdate, I was telling Andrea how I pictured my life going over the next two years in regards to work etc... and I ended it by telling her in my perfect world we would be pregnant together again at the same time.  Andrea reacted like that was crazy and how the chances of that happening were slim to none.  I thought so too, especially since Andrea was hoping to get pregnant sooner rather than later, and I was planning on getting pregnant later.  I knew if anything our next baby's would be somewhat close, I figured maybe within 9 months of each other.  But now...our due dates are a day apart!  So we're going through it all again.  When I knew we were moving and I would think about Andrea and telling her we were moving, I would immediately get teary eyed.  I knew this friendship would be the most difficult to say good-bye to.  Thankfully our good-bye wasn't as emotional as I anticipated with busy toddlers around.  But I miss her and Grayson so much.  I truly appreciate how she just gets it.  And I appreciate that!  She understands when she texts and I don't respond for hours or sometimes days.  And I know that she understands when I don't respond right away. 
I'm sad that these two babies won't grow up and get to know each other like Grayson and Helena.  I'm sad that Grayson and Helena no longer have playdates. 
There are many differences between Andrea and I, in the way we plan, the way we parent etc...But we have these common threads that are irreplaceable.  It's this natural understanding that I love.
I know Andrea and I will stay in touch, but I also know it just isn't the same. 

2 comments:

Andrea Ryall said...

You are so sweet. I can't believe all the details you remember. You are so detail oriented. All of it true and so much still left unsaid. We have shared what feels like decades of friendship in such a short time. God's been at work in our lives during this season even before I came to Christ in those dark days after our weddings! This pregnancy #2 that we are doing together is still just as special even though yoi guys are far away. Maybe that's why He walked us so closely through our weddings and first pregnancies and so much more! Love you friend! Thanks for making me laugh and cry at the same time!

Emily Foley said...

That's awesome! how funny!