Monday, October 10, 2011

just me

Chris is out of town. He left Friday late afternoon and doesn’t return until dinner time on Wednesday. This is a little bit of an adjustment for me. More of an adjustment than when he unofficially moved in back in July. I miss his presence and knowing I’m going to see him at the end of my work day. But at the same time I’ve enjoyed doing stuff back on my time. Just doing it…whenever. Going back to my independent self. Not that I’m not independent with Chris in my life or this relationship. I just find myself doing things that I’ve always wanted someone there to help me out with, still doing them by myself. Either because I’m not used to have someone to rely upon or because I’m not yet comfortable with the fact that I have someone there for me or I don’t want to come across as an inconvenience. I figure if this was happening in my life right now and I didn’t have a boyfriend I would have to take care of it myself. So why not just do it how I would have normally done it? Does that even make any sense? Probably not, but I do like to think I know what I'm talking about. Let me give you an example.
About a month or so ago my check engine light came on in my car. I put it off for a while because it kept going off. Then I realized I was leaking oil. I told Chris I wanted to get it checked out, but we’ve been busy etc…and we just never got around to it. On Friday after I dropped Chris off at the airport I went to a new Firestone right by house. They were near closing and said it was ok to have them keep my car over night. I walked home. Saturday it rained all day. Firestone called me and said I could come pick up my car. I walked to go pick up the car in the rain. No fun. I wore a windbreaker and had an umbrella, but it was windy, cold, and raining. Once I arrived I wasn’t soaked, but definitely wet. No fun. I took my car to the local Grease Monkey to get the leaky oil problem fixed and made an appointment on Wednesday morning to take my car to Toyota. Dealing with the initial problem was fine, easy even. Walking in the rain, dealing with driving to Toyota early Wednesday morning, not so easy.
After the fact I was doing some errands on Saturday afternoon chatting with Chris and I'm thinking to myself "Isn't this one of the perks of having a boyfriend?/having someone be there for you?/to rely upon?" But why try and do it the easy way, when I've always had to do things the "hard" way because in the past I didn't have a boyfriend to pick me up from the car place or take me to the car place etc...
I guess all of this is an adjustment. And something have gone easier than others. Like I mentioned living together. Chris unofficially moved in, in July. Officially he moved in, in September. I've had people ask me "how is that going?" Considering that I've lived by myself for the past 6+ years, you would think it would have been a huge adjustment. And prior when I was single and would think about the process and what it would be like to live with a significant other, the idea was always so overwhelming in my head. But in this instant that I'm living, there really hasn't been adjustment. I love that it's been so easy, that we get to see each other everyday.

I've noticed that the biggest adjustment for me, is just knowing that I have someone there. That the next time I need to get my car looked at, I'll make sure Chris is in town to help me out.

treadmill 20min/core 30min


sarahlove said...

You are nuts. I can't believe that you walked from the auto place and back again the next day and didn't count that as a workout?!

When love is right, it's just right. There isn't an adjustment period. It just fits. Sounds pretty darn perfect to me.

PS. HA! I actually beat Emily in commenting before her. She must have been cleaning up spilled milk. ;)

the emily said...

Yes Sarah, I was. No use crying over it I suppose, I'll just have to be second today. Sad. :)

I've long said that if Dave died I would really miss the convenience of him. Of course I would miss HIM, but I would really miss him being able to kill spiders for me, and reach things on the high shelf, and take the car to get the oil changed. It's nice to have somebody that has your back.

I never lived with a guy until I got married. It wasn't nearly the adjustment I was expecting.

Anonymous said...

....and you thought I stopped reading your posts! LOL I didn't, but when you have kids in sports, you'll understand why I don't get to this page much! Anyway, I think its awesome that you are so independent. Never lose that. However, its also good that you recognize that its okay to depend on someone else. I am so glad that you have Chris in your life and can enjoy having some one there to depend on once in a while! xo -Kari